The list of amazing reasons why you should live abroad is never-ending. Some days I think I want to live abroad forever, worried that the lack of cultural, foreign language stimulation in the United States would bore me after awhile. This time, I felt differently.
This time I stayed away long enough that it got to be too much.
For 18 months I never had a break. Not even a small vacation to a country nearby. I don’t hate this country, and I will no doubt return. I know this because I still have a list of things I love, a language I’ve learned that I fear will go dormant in the deep crevasses of my brain if I stay away too long, and places and friends that I look forward to revisiting. In the last days before flying home, I wasn’t counting down the days, but I noticed a difference in my attitude toward living abroad.
- When you really, truly, miss home, you know it’s time to go home. When you’re gone for long enough that it’s no longer the material things you long for, but when instead it’s the things you used to take for granted that you long for, (the home-cooked meals, running into everyone you know at the supermarket), its a sign. Everyone asked me what I would miss after leaving, and I wasn’t able to think of anything that really concerned where I currently was. I also wasn’t focusing on the material luxuries I had been missing out on in America. I was looking forward to the fresh air of the countryside and the comforting silence of living away from the city that I had known my entire childhood in rural Iowa. I knew, for the first time in all the time I’ve spent abroad, that it was time to go home for awhile.
- When you have one month left in a foreign country and you find that you have no last minute desires…places to go, things to eat, things to see that you’ve been putting off for months…you know it’s time to go home. With one month left before returning home, I had a list of “things to do” once I’d arrived back on US soil, but I didn’t have but a couple things that I wanted to accomplish while still abroad. If you’re someone that appreciates a change in scenery, then once the list has run dry, its time to move on; generally, the sooner the better.
- When you no longer have interest in meeting new people and you stop putting effort forth to get to know the people you do meet, it’s time to go home. New friendships are hard work, and it takes time to build them. If you have a long enough to meet and build these relationships, it’s wonderful and is something that will forever enrich your life. If you have the energy for new friends right up to your going away party, then you’re leaving on a high note and will most likely miss it when you leave. When that motivation slows, when you’re avoiding the bars because thats where new people hang out, and when new people no longer strike your curiosity chord, it’s better to leave saying ‘see you later’ to your nearest and dearest, and look for something new.
- When you spend more time researching a new destination than you do enjoying where you currently are, it’s time to go home. Most travelers have ideas, lots of them. Some are short term, for the upcoming vacation, others are long term, just ideas to be considered in more detail at a later time. Although I had a world trip on the back burner, the places I had yet to visit where I was currently living were dominating my daily daydreaming sessions. Before ever arriving in any destination, you know the most extraordinary places that cannot be missed. For the majority of my time abroad, I still had a list of these places to see. This list was complete and I still had four months remaining; these four months stretched out and felt like torture. I lost interest in learning about the culture and language I was immersed in, lost in thoughts of a trip I was planning that was still more than six months away. Going home to continue your research allows your senses to relax from foreign land overload and gives your energy a kickstart when heading off again.
- When you spend more time communicating with friends in faraway lands than with the people surrounding you, it’s time to go home. Wherever you go, for whatever reason, you meet people. While traveling and living abroad, these people often become lifelong friends. When you still appreciate the relationship you have with the people around you, but you’re choosing others far, far away over the people just next to you, its okay to say “see you later” and get away for awhile. The strongest relationships can endure any amount of distance and will always have a force pulling it back together.
It’s okay to need a break. It’s okay to be in need of something familiar. Your mind will tell you when it’s had enough of a foreign land, just as it will tell you when it’s ready to once again be surrounded by the unknown.
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